Wednesday, May 1, 2013

IWSG: Weariness

It's that time of month, where we can whine, kick, or encourage with all our fellow Insecure Writers. This amazing monthly blog hop, hosted by Ninja Captain Alex J. Cavanaugh has been a huge benefit to my writing and blogging. I hope it has been for yours too!

This month, I'm weary. Overwhelmed.

This is not about the A to Z challenge, it's about life and writing and blogging and teaching and housecleaning and yard work and homeschooling and writing and blogging and life and . . . everything just seeming to pile up.

Or, it's the fact that my thyroid levels are low. I have hypothyroidism with Hashimoto's Disease and a goiter. Most of the time the symptoms are under control with medication, but lately they don't seem to be and a recent blood test confirmed that my levels are low. The problem is, I seem to be forgetful about taking my medicine, which is driving me nuts. I have one of those pill holders now like the one my grandma used to have. . .you know the ones where each day of the week has its own container.

The problem is, I'm not sure which it is: just too much craziness in life, or the thyroid thing.

Either way, I'm just weary. With 8 hours of sleep behind me, I still feel like I could easily retreat under the covers of my bed this morning.

And insecurity, well defying it is taking some serious effort these last few days. Yesterday, I almost wanted to sit down in the middle of a walking trail that seemed all uphill, and just give in to the feeling that I would never, ever have enough energy to make it up that hill, or finish revising my second book, or get all the things done that seem to be piling up.

However, I did climb the hill, and I did write, and I did homeschool my kids yesterday, and I did grade papers, and I did get up this morning, write, and make a mammoth list of things to do, which I then broke into reasonable chunks.

I will continue to defy insecurity.

And I will continue to defy weariness. (as well as figure out if this is a thyroid thing, or something else with another blood test and doc app scheduled in a few weeks)

I didn't want to write a whiny, kicking my feet type post this month, but I'm laying it all out there like raw road rash.

How are you doing this month? Are you defying insecurity? Are you walking about with a spring in your step?





24 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

You need to remember to take that pill!
Take a moment sometime soon to recharge. Then you'll have more of that can-do spirit.

Tyrean Martinson said...

Alex - Yes I do. It is a pain in the rear, but I need to remember it somehow.
And yes, a moment to recharge would be good.
Thanks for the uplift!

jaybird said...

I can relate to this so much! This past month my health has gone down-hill. My house looks like a bomb went off, the school nurse called and told me to come pick up my daughter because she was exposed to lice. ARGH!! My whole house is in an uproar...I can't seem to catch a break. When does the crazy end? When will I ever be able to sit down, much less sneak in some writing?

michelle said...

I'm defying insecurity in another manner. Just trying to accept that it is what it is.

Writer In Transit

Julie Musil said...

I'm GLAD you laid it all out there. That's what this group is all about.

You showed a great deal of determination by pushing forward, despite your weariness.

J.L. Campbell said...

Hi, Tyrean,

I can only imagine the toll hypothyroidism takes on you. I seem to be tired a lot of the time, which does prevent me from getting stuff done.

Seems to me though that you've accomplished a lot even feeling the way you do. I think you have the right idea of breaking your task down into little bits and I believe keeping at it is the part that's most important.

Hope you get better at remembering your medication.

Julie Flanders said...

Here's to continuing to defy that insecurity! Kudos to you. :)

I'm so sorry about your medical condition, and hope you will get some relief from the weariness soon. Whatever is causing it, it's certainly no fun. Take care!

Brandon Ax said...

Sorry for your medical issue flaring up. It is hard enough just trying to manage all regular stuff a writer has to do. If you even need and ear let me know.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

I can relate to the weariness. This year was far more than expected.

My husband takes thyroid medicine and we can both tell when he misses a day.

Al Diaz said...

Aw, Tyrean, can I hug you? I so much feel your words. But no matter what, you're the Champion, remember? Champions don't give up, no matter how hard it is, they just don't. And you're not alone. At least, you have all dragon dwarves cheering for you. Tyrean can do it! Tyrean can do it!!

Sarah Chafin said...

I relate with you. I have been feeling so weary lately. I home school too. That on its own can be a challenge! I'm plugging away, trying to make it to summer break. Hopefully then I will have energy to come up with a plan and get my time and house on a better schedule. Simply Sarah

Julie Luek said...

I have been reading through Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way. One of the things I like most about it is her emphasis on making rest, restoration, and pampering a priority in our time. This is how we continue to feed our hearts so it can adequately pump out its life source to others. It's the "lie down by still waters" idea.

Suzanne Furness said...

So sorry you are feeling weary, Tyrean. Please look after yourself and plan a little 'you' time real soon. Maybe just writing this post has made you feel a little stronger. Take care.

Candilynn Fite said...

Ugh, I feel your pain. For me, it's Fibromyalgia. It totally sucks. All over body pain, sluggish, always tired. For 3 months nobody could diagnose it. Some days, it hurts to get out of bed. Trying a new med right now, and it seems to be helping a lot. I so hope you get to feeling better!! Happy IWSG post day!

L.G. Smith said...

You know I can relate to the thyroid thing since I've got the same condition. It's always a battle to get the darn thing regulated right. My doc has me on massive doses of vitamin D too, though I don't think it does much.

I do find that if I exercise regularly (I do interval training on the treadmill) it helps with the downer mood and tiredness I feel from the thyroid. Though I KNOW how hard it is to initially get motivated to do anything active when you feel so sluggish in your body. Fingers crossed they get your meds sorted out and you get some relief. The foggy head is actually the worst symptom for me. Blah.

Natalie Aguirre said...

I have the same disease, so can totally relate. I'm faithful in taking my medicine but seem to drag even with it some days. I end of drinking pots of coffee those days because of course they hit on days I have to go to work. Just hang in there. And be glad the challenge is done. I am!

Tyrean Martinson said...

jaybird - my house looks like that too, and lice - yikes! I'll be praying for you! Hope we both catch a break soon.

michelle - sometimes I think that might be the healthier way

Julie M - Thank for your Encouragement!

JL - Thanks! Yes, remembering the medication and taking thing in small step seem to be the best remedies

Julie F - Thanks!

Brandon - Thanks for the offer!

Diane - I understand about everyone in the household knowing when the medication is missed for a day. Sometimes, my husband will ask me, "Did you remember your pill this morning, and . . . then I'll discover the oops. However, if I wait too late, I can't take it, because it will keep me up all night.

Al - Thanks for the virtual hugs, and the awesome dwarf cheer! I really appreciate that!

Sarah - Summer break is looking really good right now! My oldest is having an 8th grade graduation from our homeschool co-op this Sat, and then there's a formal homeschool dance with three homeschool co-ops working together, and then we still aren't done with our lessons until late June . . .yes, summer is looking good, and not soon enough.

Julie L - I started reading that book, and then I lost track of that too, but she is right, and you are right - there is definitely a time when rest is needed, and the Good Shepherd leads us beside still waters. (I'm just going to have to carve out that time somehow.)

Suzanne - it actually did help to write it out and share it, but I definitely need that "me" time that's away from it all . . .somehow.

Candilynn - I've heard of how bad that is, and I'm so sorry you have that. I hope your new med continues to work well and all goes well!

LG - the foggy head keeps me from remembering things, which then just adds to that sense of feeling overwhelmed . . .yuck. Anyhow, thanks for the tip. I've found that exercise definitely helps, and sometimes I try to do 10 minute intervals throughout the day to keep boosting myself in the right direction.

Natalie - I gave up caffeine a year ago, and slowly I've been picking it up again, but I've found that I get in a really bad "down" cycle if I forget my meds and I'm on caffeine . . .
Thanks for your encouragement! I hope your thyroid med works better too.

Tyrean Martinson said...

jaybird - my house looks like that too, and lice - yikes! I'll be praying for you! Hope we both catch a break soon.

michelle - sometimes I think that might be the healthier way

Julie M - Thank for your Encouragement!

JL - Thanks! Yes, remembering the medication and taking thing in small step seem to be the best remedies

Julie F - Thanks!

Brandon - Thanks for the offer!

Diane - I understand about everyone in the household knowing when the medication is missed for a day. Sometimes, my husband will ask me, "Did you remember your pill this morning, and . . . then I'll discover the oops. However, if I wait too late, I can't take it, because it will keep me up all night.

Al - Thanks for the virtual hugs, and the awesome dwarf cheer! I really appreciate that!

Sarah - Summer break is looking really good right now! My oldest is having an 8th grade graduation from our homeschool co-op this Sat, and then there's a formal homeschool dance with three homeschool co-ops working together, and then we still aren't done with our lessons until late June . . .yes, summer is looking good, and not soon enough.

Julie L - I started reading that book, and then I lost track of that too, but she is right, and you are right - there is definitely a time when rest is needed, and the Good Shepherd leads us beside still waters. (I'm just going to have to carve out that time somehow.)

Suzanne - it actually did help to write it out and share it, but I definitely need that "me" time that's away from it all . . .somehow.

Candilynn - I've heard of how bad that is, and I'm so sorry you have that. I hope your new med continues to work well and all goes well!

LG - the foggy head keeps me from remembering things, which then just adds to that sense of feeling overwhelmed . . .yuck. Anyhow, thanks for the tip. I've found that exercise definitely helps, and sometimes I try to do 10 minute intervals throughout the day to keep boosting myself in the right direction.

Natalie - I gave up caffeine a year ago, and slowly I've been picking it up again, but I've found that I get in a really bad "down" cycle if I forget my meds and I'm on caffeine . . .
Thanks for your encouragement! I hope your thyroid med works better too.

M. J. Joachim said...

It's okay to step back and breathe. Sometimes we really need to. And sleep if you need to sleep. Our bodies have a way of demanding what we truly need. There's no brownie button for stressing out and driving yourself crazy. Listen to your body and say yes to it. I hope you feel better soon.

Stephen Tremp said...

My wife and I are each other's spotters for supplements. Otherwise I would forget. Its easy. So having someone, family or friend, to hold you accountable is the way to go.

Mark Means said...

Bleh, sorry to hear you're feeling weary...I think a lot of us can relate, though. This past month has, in one way or the other, did a bit of a number on all of us doing the A to Z challenge.

The important thing, though, is that you didn't succumb...you persevered...and just that knowledge should help carry you through the next bout. You know you can do it.

Hope things calm down for you, soon :)

Tyrean Martinson said...

M.J. - Thanks! I think that yes, it's definitely time to breathe, whether my family wants to or not. I spent an hour napping in the spring sun on our deck yesterday. And then last night, my oldest daughter started feeling a sick and we discovered she was running a fever. So we are all on family rest now. (all the dance classes, etc have been put on hold)

Stephen - My husband tries to help me that way, but there are days when I honestly don't know for sure if I took my pill or not. However, I am trying a new system with the whole "days of the week" pill container, sitting out where my hubs can see it too, and hopefully that will help.

Mark - Thanks for the uplift!
And things are calming down . . . in a way. My oldest is sick so she can't go to all of her dance classes, etc, and we are all in rest mode now.

Michael Di Gesu said...

Tyrean,

WHINE< KICK, AND SCREAM... that's what this post is for... LOL.

I friend of mine has that disease...She has days like you too... DON't FORGET the meds.

I know it sucks ... I have to take a daily arthritis pill and I HATE IT, but the alternative is to be crippled. Need I say more.

Thankfully we have these meds to help us. Popping pills is not an "old ladies thing" I have been "popping" since I was in my early thirties.

You're doing great. We all have TEMPORARY set backs, but OUR STRONG WILLS will get us through it!

Jeff Hargett said...

Defying insecurity sounds a bit like courage to me. Defying insecurity day after day sounds a bit like resolute determination. I've got a feeling that you'll have this thing licked in short order. Stay strong!